The Waiting Game?

Lately I’ve been hearing a lot of people getting together, married, or relationships improving. Some of these people have been dating and/or having relations (shout out to Bill) long-term, but in between the start date and the current, there has been a lot of B.S. I love hearing and seeing someone happy, however what must a girl go through with her man to get there?! Why are girls going through so much to be in a normal, healthy, loving relationship with someone; shouldn’t that just be the default, instead of the goal? Is The Dating Game really The Waiting Game???

A guy friend told me one of our friends was engaged to his girl, whom he has cheated on a gazillion times, in which my friend said “she earned that ring.” WHAT!? So I can’t get the ring because I’m awesome and you love me? You have to cheat first, and make me cry, and break my heart a few times THEN give me what I deserve? Ummm *confused BBM face*. Why do I get the wedding AFTER you have kids with someone else? Why do I get your love AFTER you’ve given all of your lust away? Why do we have to wait for you?

I don’t want to be one of those 35-year old single black women complaining about the dating pool, but I also don’t want to be a in relationship or married to someone who has disappointed me a billion times. No matter how much you love the man, you’re settling for him! It’s like saying “I love you sooo much more than I do myself that I’ll take whatever you give me until it’s what I want.” Why? You really don’t think you can be with someone else? Whatever happened to "There's plenty of fish in the sea”!?

I get two people growing together, I get a man having his fears and I get putting up with someone because I’m sure whoever I marry would have put up with some of my antics along the way. I also get sticking it out to some degree; however some things are just not worth sticking through. Some things are just not cool enough to put up with. At some point, you have to have a certain level of respect for yourself that wouldn’t even allow you to be with someone after they’ve betrayed you/cheated on you/constantly lied to you/disregarded you/abused you/whatever he did that made you feel like shit.

Happiness is not something you should have to wait for. Happiness is not a privilege or a goal. Even if at the end of all the shitty days the sun does come out; how worth it was the journey?