In dating, sometimes you can wrongfully judge a book by its cover. You meet a guy, and you decide who you think he is, who he's going to be, and what you think you want from him. These judgements are based on attractiveness, little facts you learned through conversation, stalking him on his facebook and twitter, and/or what you heard from people who know him (if you're lucky). From these pre-judgments, a decision is made: to date or not to date. If he is so lucky, you and the young man begin the process of "Getting To Know Eachother." In this process, a girl must be very careful to pay attention because this is a pivotal point in which all other decisions must be based. At this time you need to find out his credit score!
To more easily decipher through the mess in which I have labeled my dating life (sad). I am now classifying boys (I haven't met any men) into 3 groups based on what they deserve from me. American Express, Debit, and Pre-paid Rush Cards.
American Express guys
Haven't found this yet, obviously. Although, I made a mistake of putting one person here because I judged him to be so great. I guess the pressure of my sainthood label was too much for him because he committed credit suicide and completely dropped out of this category. Sigh, I thought he was a good one too!
I honestly, can't even tell you of an American Express credit worthy guy, but when I find out, I will let you know. For now, let's just say he'll be like no one you've ever met (in the best way possible)!
Debit guys
This is where most guys should fall (unless you have a bad problem picking men). They add money to their card, they have higher spending potential...simple. Give a man credit based on his actions, not from what you hope he deserves. Allow him to show you what he deserves and you can give him a little more at a time. We make the mistake of thinking we like or even love someone so much we just give them a bunch of free shit! I am not a gift bag and neither are you!
Pre-paid Rush card guys
Ugh, this is the worst of the worst! These guys are complete bums. They hardly ever have any credit on their card, yet they just swipe, swipe, SWIPE! They are beyond undeserving of whatever you have to offer, but for the sake of Christianity you are nice to them. These guys can be exes who've demoted themselves soooo much, but you still answer their calls every once in a while. They can be someone you've recently met, who has messed up so much already you think either he's a complete idiot or he must hate you!
These guys are in need of serious credit help, and you are not the one to do it. Leave them alone! Allow them to file for bankruptcy on their own terms and build up their credit without you. I do believe a person can build their wealth, I just wouldn't wait for it. If he comes back flashing, even a Debit card, with limited coins on it, then maybe you can meet up in person. Until that time comes, keep your interactions with him few and far in between. You don't want that kind of brokeness rubbing off on you! When I say brokeness, it's not in terms of money. It's a broken spirit, that allows a person to not appreciate or respect a great thing when it's right in front of them. His de-value of the credit in which you deserve will always be his downfall in the end. As they say: You never miss a good thing til it leaves you!
So, I hope this small lesson in credit is helpful, but most of all, I hope you are realistic about your own credit score! You can't be a Baby Phat card looking for an American Express man. Get yourself where you need to be and then seek your equal. I am not perfect!!! I have fears and insecurities and issues I need to get past, however I know what I give and I know what I deserve to get back + bonus points!
In any other race, one would tell you to "Go For The Gold,!" but in dating, always go for The Platinum!
Please note: This message is not intended for Gold Diggers. I am not telling you to go after a man's money. Get your own coins, Big girl ; )
Xoxo,
Di Marie
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